Saturday, March 31, 2012

i could honestly just kill myself right now

i told my sister about me and danny having sex. she made me feel like such a bad person about it.

she made me kind of question myself and question my worth. it really makes me feel like a piece of a shit person.

danny could leave me. he really could. i gave him everything and he can justt go destroy that. he says he wont but he could change his mind. i can't do this. were gonna break up and how am i gonna deal with that? you know how fucked up i am already? i wouldnt know what to do. that is so scary.

i just wanna end life now. i dont wanna do it. i just can't. why did i fucking have sex with him? thats gonna fuck me up for good. im not strong enough to deal with that.

i'm having a panic attack and i want to cut badly. im also drunk and high. and im coming off my medicine. im a wreck right now. i need to sleep. hopefully i feel better in the morning..hopefully ill fall asleep quick so these thoughts stop.

1 comment:

  1. your not a bad person honey
    you love him and thats a good basis for a relationship you trust him
    dont let others make you feel inferior coz it was ur descision to and it felt right
    shes just being protective so dw
    and you wont lose him if you stop obsessing your guna loose him you have him now and thats the main thing so dont worry about the future too much if u do it will make you panic
    i believe evreything happens for a reason so what will be will be
    much love
    xx

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